So it’s been a while since I even opened up my blog, 17 months in fact. If you’ve read my last few posts you’ll see 2018 wasn’t a great one for me. I had high hopes for 2019, Dom and I bannered the year with the word ‘ADVENTURE’, we were ready to embrace life and try new things. Well we embraced life, it looked nothing like we planned and our worlds were turned upside down. A few very close friends decided to move overseas following the call of God for them, which impacted our social circles, support networks and church world. We were very excited for our friends, but also sad at the same time. Dom quit his job towards the end of the year and decided to try something new, he’s still on the adventure of working out what the new is lol. I also decided to diversify my employment, making changes to my role at church, reducing some hours there and embarking on starting a couple of side businesses. Needless to say, we held on for dear life in 2019 with the tips of our fingers like one of those theme park horror rides and it was definitely not the fun type of adventure we had dreamed of.
We stepped into 2020, flying out on the 1st of January on a trip to NZ, to see my youngest brother marry the love of his life, we also celebrated the upcoming wedding of one of my best friends daughters and welcomed my newest niece into the world. It was two weeks packed with love, joy, celebration, family, friends, future and more. What a start to a new year, it was full of hope, anticipation and expectation.
Not long after we returned we noticed that the Rideshare work we were both doing was getting very quiet and as the news erupted about Covid19, the world literally shut down around us all. Words like ‘unprecedented’ were on every news cycle, letting us know that everything happening had not been seen like this before.
This year has again not become what I dreamed, it has carried in new challenges, a new way of life, new ways of connecting with people around us and causing many to assess and relook at what is important.
I personally have not enjoyed my world over the past few months. Early on as the world shut down, I had a panic attack purely over the fact I could not spend time with people. We had friends living with us, so there was a house full, but I confessed to them, they were not enough for me lol. The restrictions and limited contact caused me to feel out of control and isolated like I had not experienced before.
I know many people have reacted differently in this season. Many of the voices we hear on social media have been vocal about embracing the new time we have found, up-skilling, getting tasks done around the home and keeping active, but please know that is not everyone. If you are not one of these people, take the pressure off yourself and just do what you can.
You may be enjoying the extra time with family or that extra time may be pushing you over the edge and you have nowhere to hide 😉. You may be completely motivated to plan and dream or you may not be able to get past what has to be done today. You could be discovering a new hobby or interest or lacking the motivation to pick up the hobbies you already had. You may have found a new lease on exercise or you could be making an indent on your couch as you binge the tv shows you’ve discovered. You could be like me and have intentions about using the time and end up with a fence only half painted 🤣. Whatever place you are in, that is okay for today and know however you are responding is okay, what is important is that you find people who can support you where you are at.
As I mentioned, I really struggled early on, the days have got better, but there have been some rough patches. I’ve bounced between the tv bingeing to planning the relaunch no my blog and social media presence. I’ve swayed between crying and laughing. I’ve been up and down emotionally. But what has carried me to this point is knowing what my anchor is attached to and knowing my true north, it has been finding the gold nuggets of gratitude amongst the chaos, it has been having a safe place in my husbands arms, it has been spending time with God, it has been allowing myself to feel and experience the emotions, the frustrations, the fear and my faith. It has been all of it, every part. I have been stretched, I have grown, I have fought it, I have embraced it. There is not one thing that will help you navigate what is happening in the world currently, so much is still unknown. Even when a vaccine is created, what will our normal look like? But these questions and thoughts do not mean we stay in a place of being overwhelmed by what we do not know or what we cannot see. Here are a couple of things we can start to do.
1. Fix your eyes on Jesus. Make Him your starting point, your anchor, your friend. If you don’t know him, it’s simple to connect. A prayer. Ask Him to forgive you for not living a life that follows and honors Him, then ask Him to be your guide, your friend, your Lord. Choose in this moment to put your life in His hands and walk in His footsteps.
You don’t have to know everything before you pray, I mean who will ever know everything or have everything right? Let Him help you sort through your stuff.
I read a great story today in BillyGraham.org, it said, “The words of the prayer are not magical,” Gloria said. “The important thing is the attitude of your heart.”1
Your heart attitude is what is important. That leads me to my second point.
2. Be grateful. There is something, at least one thing/person/situation, to be grateful for every day. So start. Make a jar, record what you are grateful for and put it in there, or get a book and each day make a record of something you are thankful for. The key is then on the bad days, you can look and be reminded of the good things, of the things that have already happened which make way for the next good thing to happen.
What happens is that your gratitude becomes your attitude, you shift your mind, your heart and your emotions. Don’t you think it’s times like these we need to become even more aware of the little things around us to be thankful for? To take stock, to pause and appreciate the good, the blessings God is showing you, the people around you.
So there’s two simple steps you can start today to help you get through tomorrow and begin to dream again about your future.
Stay safe.
Ange
Footnote:
1.
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